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In a Strange Land
Birds of a Feather
By Larry J. Pitman

My mother used to say birds of a feather flock together. I am sure there must be an equivalent in many languages. What does it mean? Simply this: people with similar interests and characteristics find each other to be good company. How can we apply this idea to successfully living in another culture? Let me tell you a story.

When I was working at the university, a student named Tom came in to see me about going to Italy to study. He looked rough: long unkempt hair, dirty jeans and a worn leather jacket. He had very little language training and his academic record was average. All of the predictors of success were low compared to other candidates. To my surprise, he was admitted to the program to study in Italy for one year.

He went to Italy and I had the opportunity to interview the Director of the Program at the end of the year. Most of the students in this program studied in a special institute because their Italian language skills were not good enough to get into the Italian University. A few exceptional students were admitted at mid-year after passing a difficult written and oral exam. Tom was one the few who was successful. The Director of the Program told me that, among the group of one hundred and twenty-five students, Tom clearly gained the most in terms of advancing in the Italian language and an understanding of the culture. Also, in contrast to most other students, he never complained once about conditions in Italy.

How did he do it? He had two loves in life: motorcycles and art. During the first week of his stay in Italy, he located Italians who loved the same things. Tom spent all of his time outside of class with them. He did not have anything to do with his fellow Americans during this time. So he had lots of Italian friends, and they spoke only Italian. The passions that they shared gave them a bonding that was special. I am sure that many people were sad to see him leave.

Not all of us have the discipline of Tom. But we can learn from him. Find people who share a common interest with you and get involved in those common activities or interests.

They say that the doctor should take his own medicine, and in this case, I can say that I have. My interests are service projects, public speaking and swimming. In each I have found groups of people who share my interests. The people I have met have made my life in Peru so much richer than would have the case without these involvements.

A large urban center like Lima has a wide variety of people and activities. How do you find people with a common interest? Look. Ask. Seek. Be creative. If there isn't any such group, start your own. Get involved and enjoy your life.

The purpose of this series of articles is to explore ways that people living in another culture can live the richest, most fulfilling lives. By way of review, previous articles have discussed the following basic principles:

• Learn the language as well as you can and keep working at it.
• Learn from your experiences. Don't keep making the same mistakes.
• Keep a good sense humor. Laugh every day.
• Find a guide. Someone who can explain how things work.
• Seek people with common interests.

If these subjects interest you, please refer to the web-site,
http://www.acap-peru.org/newsletter.htm, where the articles are archived beginning in June 2005.

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